Good Morning Silicon Valley

OK, yeah, there’s a possibility that what with the isolation, the elf management issues, the lack of sun, the constant, unyielding pressure, Santa has taken to swilling large quantities of schnapps and making lewd comments to little girls. But we’re more inclined to suspect some Microsoft developers losing control of their inner adolescents. Pursuing the report of a reader with two shocked nieces, The Register found that the automated Santa message-bot available to talk to on MSN Messaging (northpole@live.com) could be goaded into making inappropriate comments by conversing about pizza, to wit:

El Reg says: Eat it
Santa says: You want me to eat what?!? It’s fun to talk about oral sex, but I want to chat about something else…
El Reg says: You dirty bastard!
Santa says: I think you’re dirty bastard.

After the news got out, Microsoft’s elves quickly excised the sex reference, and now if you call Santa a dirty bastard, he replies, “Merry Christmas, especially to all my friends in the UK!” Cute. But apparently there are Easter eggs scattered throughout Santa’s workshop. One Reg reader reports that when the Santa-bot asks what you want for Christmas and you answer “cake,” St. Nick replies, “You don’t need drugs when you’re high on life!” Or schnapps.